Husband Wife Jokes | Hindi Husband Wife Jokes

Shadi ke Pehle aur Baad me

Shadi ke pehle maine pyar kiya.
Shadi ke baad ye maine kya kiya?
Shadi ke pehle Dil to Pagal Hai.
Shadi ke baad dil to pahal tha!

Wife ko begum

Wife ko begum kyon kehte hai?
Ans: Kyonki shadi ke baad sare gum to husband
se hisse mein aate hai,
aur biwi Be-Gum ho jai Hai!!!

Roles of Man in Life

Different roles of Man in life:
Sagai ke samay superman,
Shadi ke samay Gentleman,
10 saal baad watchman,
20 saal baad Doberman.

Marriage Broker & Wife

Marriage Broker: Tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye?
Man: Mujhe chand jaisi biwi chahiye,
jo raat ko aaye aur subha chali jaye!

Who is Wife

Biwi vo hoti hai jo,
Shaadi ke baad apne pati baad apne
pati kisari aadadto
kobadal deti hai,
aur baad me kehti hai ki,
“aap pehle jaise nahi rahe”.

Husband’s Feeling

Husband wife ki godh mein leta hua thaa.
Wife: Kaisa lag raha hai ji?
Husband: Aise jaise Bhagwan Vishnu shesh naag ki Godh mein lete hon.

Wife’s Question

Wife: kyon jab main moti hojaaungi,tab bhi tum mujhe aise hi pyaar karoge?
Husband: bilkul nahin, maine sirf such dukh main saath dene ka vaada kiya tha.

Theft in a House

pati: Ghar ka saara keemti samaan kahin chhupa kar rakh do, padosi aa rahe hain.
patni: Kyonji ! kya Aapke dost chura lenge?
pati: are Nahin, who apna saaman pehchaan lenge.

Husband’s Question

Pati: mere mrne ke baad tumhe mere jaisa doosra aadmi nahin milega.
Patni: tumhe kisne keh diya, ki main doosra aadmi tumhare jaisa chahti hoon.

Effect of Wife

Sagai Hui… Shadi Hui…
Biwi Ghar Mein Aayi…
Ghar Swarg Ban Gaya…
Aur main “Swargwasi”…

Husband Wife College

Wife: College ke bare me tumhara koi bura anubhav hai?
Husband: Han, Tumhari aur meri paheli mulakat college me he to hui thi.

Husband Wife

Husband: main jeevan main aaj jo kuch bhi bana hoon,apne aap bana hoon.
Wife: lo, main aaj tak bekar hi bhagwaan ko kosti rahi.

Wife’s question on Gift

Wife: Shadi ke pehle to tum mujhe rof gift diya karte they, ab kyun nahi dete?
Husband: Machhali pakdne ke baad bhi kya koi chara dalta hai!

Wife’s Bank Account

Pati: main tumhare saath kuch bhi share kar sakta hu.
Patni: chalo phir bank account se start karte hain.

Beggar, Wife and Husband

A beggar- ‘Oh sundari ! Andha hoon.
Sawa paanch rupya de de..
“Husband said 2 his wife- De de, tujhe
sundari bola hai to har haal mein andha hai”

Wife’s Death

Wife: Ma bachungi nahi, Marr jaongi…
Husband: Mein bhi Marr jaon ga!
Wife: Mein to Bimaar hoon isleya marr jaungi tum kyon maro gaye?
Husband: Mein itni Khushi Bardasht nahi kar sakta!

Wife’s Last Wish

Ek makeup sacheton lady ne mritu kaal par uski pati se daka.
Pati:bolo tumhara antim issa keya hai?
Patni:mere marne ke bad meri sundar tasbir akhbar pe chapne par mere age math likhna.
Pati:kiun?
Patni:kiun ki log ye jan jayega ke meine budhi ho gaya tha.

Wife & Saali

What is the difference between wife & saali?
Saali is Beauty,
Wife is duty,
Saali is passion,
Wife is tension,
Saali is patakha,
Wife is sayapa,
Saali is cool,
Wife is fool,
Saali is tuty-fruity,
Wife is qismat futi, Saali is fresh cake,
Wife is earth quake…

Letter S

Hum ne zindagi ki shuruaaat ‘S’ se ki.
S se Suraj, S se Subah, S se Swagat, S se saaz, S se Sangeet.
Par Fir ‘S’ se Samay ne aisi karwat badli Ki ‘S’ se hamari Shadi ho gai.
Aur fir jeevan ka arth ‘S’ se Saans,
Sasural, Sala, Sali, Sasur aur ‘Sankat’ ho gaya.